Willows for Weeping Read online

  He stretched out a hand to help her to her feet. He pulled her up, standing so close they stood heart to heart together. She looked up, to find him gazing at her so intently she felt as if she was drowning in his deep blue eyes. She tried to look away, but couldn't. So had she seen a snake once, with a small field mouse in its thrall. She had stopped, too afraid to venture further, and had watched the snake glide slowly forward until it was within striking distance of its unfortunate prey.

  She blinked and pulled out of Ralph's embrace, chiding herself with the knowledge that he was no snake, nor was she a helpless mouse. She looked about her, suddenly conscious that the pilgrims had vanished from sight. All at once she was filled with an urgent need to go after them, to escape from this man who had put her heart and mind in such a dangerous whirl.

  But escape was not possible. Ralph offered her his linked hands so that she might mount his horse, and then vaulted up behind her. He took up the bridle with one hand while his free arm coiled around her waist and pulled her tight against him. Caught by surprise, Janna gave a little gasp and heard him chuckle behind her.

  'Comfortable?' he asked.

  She nodded, glad that he could not see her face. Her whole body was rigid with embarrassment.

  'I have you safe. There's nothing to fear.' His breath felt soft and warm on her cheek, while his words brought comfort. She made a conscious effort to relax against him, and felt him shift to accommodate his body to hers. So had she once ridden with Hugh, but that was a long time ago and all in the past. Hugh was gone, but Ralph was right here, so vital and alive that the very air seemed to crackle with his presence. Janna smiled to herself. The journey with the pilgrims was turning out to be a whole lot more interesting than she'd first expected.

  As soon as the pilgrim group came into view, Janna insisted on dismounting. As usual, Juliana tagged behind the others. She turned to watch their approach, her expression unreadable. Janna felt uncomfortable, but told herself she'd done her best to fit in with Juliana's wishes, crazed as they were. All the same, she made a private resolution to have nothing further to do with the other pilgrims if it was at all possible.

  Her good intentions went sadly awry when Winifred caught sight of her and turned back. Janna's heart sank. She still had no answer to give the girl. Ulf, too, appeared to have stopped walking. She wondered at her sudden popularity.

  'Have you come up with any solution to what we were talking about, Janna?' Winifred fell into place beside her. She flicked a cautious glance at Janna's companion. Her steps slowed to allow him to walk on ahead.

  'No, not yet,' Janna admitted.

  Winifred hardly waited until Ralph was out of earshot before she burst out: 'I could hardly sleep last night for worrying about the relic. And about Ulf. What if he tells the authorities I have it? Will they put me in a dungeon, Janna? Will they lock me away for ever?' She was close to tears. 'I heard tell of some poor wretch who was kept in chains for so long his feet rotted away!'

  'No, no,' Janna soothed her. 'That's not going to happen to you. I promise I'll think of something. Try not to worry about it.'

  'I wish I'd never taken the hand at all!'

  'I thought it was St Edith who prompted you to do it? You said it was a sign.'

  'And so it was! At least, I thought it was. But what if I was mistaken?'

  'Mistaken about what?' Ulf had waited until they caught up with him, and he now fell into step beside them.

  Janna considered him. Her glance flicked down to Brutus, then back again. Here was the means to allay at least one of Winifred's fears. Ulf had something to hide, she was sure of it. Perhaps she had the means to scare Ulf into silence. It was worth a try.

  'So, tell me more about the hand that I saw Brutus eating?' she challenged. She tried to read Ulf's reaction to her question. His face was guarded but, somewhat disconcertingly, there was a glint of laughter in his eyes.

  'You think it was a sacred relic?'

  'No. Yes!' Janna scowled at him, hating the fact that he'd almost tricked her into revealing Winifred's secret.

  He raised an eyebrow. 'No? Yes? Which is it?'

  'You tell me.' Janna tilted her chin and stared him down.

  'It wasn't the hand of St James.' Ulf's eyes rested thought-fully on Winifred, who flushed and turned away.

  Janna watched them both. 'If it wasn't the relic, what was it then?' she pressed.

  Ulf gave a small huff of laughter. 'You were right. It was a hand.'

  'Whose hand?' Janna felt a bit queasy at she recalled the dog slurping and chewing its dinner, and the little fragments of bone and gristle that she'd found scattered on the grass afterwards.

  'It belonged to the moneyer.'

  'The moneyer?'

  'At Wiltune. Don't you remember? His hand was cut off as punishment after he was found guilty of adding lead to the coins he made.'

  Janna gulped down a wave of nausea as she remembered the ugly scene they'd witnessed. 'How did your dog get hold of his hand?'

  'Brutus must have stolen it,' Ulf admitted. 'Usually the hand is nailed to the door of the mint, as a sign of the moneyer's crime and as a warning to others. Whether it fell off the door, or Brutus helped it down . . .?' He shook his head. Brutus thumped his tail, and licked his chops, almost as if he knew what they were talking about.

  Janna shuddered.

  'But I do thank you for not mentioning it to the abbey guard. I'm not sure what the punishment is for stealing hands.' Ulf glanced at Winifred once more. 'But I suspect it could mean trouble if the theft becomes known.'

  Janna wondered if he was talking about a sacred relic or Brutus's dinner. She didn't like to ask.

  Winifred stepped into the breach. 'You know, don't you?'

  Ulf gave her a friendly grin. 'I suspected, that's all. I saw you dodging away from our group, and I watched you push summat into a patch of holly. Obviously you were desperate to keep whatever it was hidden from the guard. And you didn't leave it behind either, for you've scratched your hands badly retrieving it!'

  Winifred quickly thrust her hands behind her back as if to hide the evidence. 'I've also noticed how interested you are in my collection of relics,' Ulf continued dryly.

  Winifred drew a shaky breath. She looked utterly wretched. 'What are you going to do about it?' she whispered. 'Will you tell the guard, will you claim the reward?'

  ''Tis tempting!'

  'You'd have to get hold of it first!' Janna stepped closer to Winifred to protect her, and the hand.

  Ulf shrugged. 'I'm in the business of relics.' He said no more but Janna wondered if he'd go so far as to find something else to take its place and then claim the reward. Either way, she thought Winifred's secret might be safe with Ulf. He'd had the opportunity to tell the guard but had kept quiet about what he'd seen. For Winifred's sake, she hoped she was right as, together, they walked on in an uncomfortable silence.

  SIX

  JANNA STOPPED DEAD, and gasped in wonder as they crested the hill and gazed downwards. The open plain spread before them, scorched to a pale golden brown in the heat of summer. At the centre, and surrounded by a deep ditch and an earthen embankment, stood a great circle of giant stone pillars, with a jumble of larger and smaller stones inside. Although many of the huge monoliths had fallen, breaking the pattern, it was still possible to see that they must once have formed circles within circles. The outside ring of colossal standing stones was linked in places by lintels that must once have formed a continuous parapet around the top. Janna marvelled at how such huge monoliths could ever have been transported, yet their pattern was too ordered to be there by an accident of nature. 'Merlin's magic', Ralph had called it. Although Janna wasn't sure who Merlin was, she felt inclined to agree with him. No human hands could ever have shifted such a vast quantity of stone, and in so mighty a form.

  'It's called Stonehenge,' said Ulf, as he waved an encompassing hand towards the ancient ruins.

  Even from a distance, Janna could sense their power and thei
r mystery. She shivered, feeling suddenly cold as the hairs rose on her arms. There were numerous grassy mounds in the vicinity of the towering stones. She had seen such things before and knew them to be ancient burial mounds. It would seem that many people had died here at some time or another.

  She began to walk once more, keeping a sharp eye on the stone circle as she went. For a while it seemed that no matter how long or how far they walked, the circle came no closer. The path they were taking had been trodden flat by other feet and seemed to lead in a straight line into the heart of the stones. Janna had an eerie feeling that she'd become part of a continuum that dated back to the dawn of time, a time of mystery and magic. Delight mingled with dread. Ralph had mentioned pagan worship and sacrifice. She closed her eyes, trying to imagine what the henge might look like on a moonlit night. And suddenly she was there, inside the stones.

  A procession of robed people walked with her, carrying smoking torches to illuminate the darkness. They were singing, a strange harmonious chant that sounded like nothing Janna had heard during her year in the abbey but yet seemed profoundly spiritual and full of mystery. A figure at the head of the procession raised his hands for silence. He was dressed in a long robe and wore a golden band around his head. In his hand he carried a long staff. The people gathered around him. The ceremony began with what sounded like a prayer, a wailing invocation to the gods. A man was herded out of the stone circle under guard, and dragged to a slab of rock close to the earthen embankment at the entrance. The monolith lay flat along the ground, reminding Janna of an altar. The prisoner was dressed only in rags. His skin was rough with sores, his hair matted with filth. The chanting stopped and the assembly gathered around the wretch. Janna could sense the anticipation of the crowd in their restive movements, although there was a deep and absolute silence now. She peered more closely at the victim, thinking that he seemed in some way familiar. A hooded guard stepped forward and pushed the prisoner onto the fallen monolith. The other guards held him down. There was a flash of a silver knife. A cry gurgled into silence; blood spilled over stone.

  Janna quickly opened her eyes, desperate to dispel the dark scene she'd conjured up. She blinked, taking a few moments to orientate herself once more. The cry of desperation still sounded in her ears, haunting and real, and yet there was no robed figure, no guards, and no sacrifice either.

  'Something good has happened here, a miracle,' she muttered to herself, trying to dispel the icy feeling of dread that seemed to have lodged in her stomach. She forced her thoughts to the lame boy and his family, and the joy they must have felt on realising that he had been made whole.

  News of the miracle must have spread far and wide, she realised, as she looked more carefully at the stone circle. While the scene seemed utterly peaceful, they were certainly not the only visitors to the site. Others had arrived at the henge before them; she could see shapes moving about, tiny as ants next to the huge monoliths.

  The stones loomed above them, growing in height as they came closer. Janna felt humble beside their towering shapes. She felt afraid.

  Afraid of what? She was jumping at shadows caused by her own vivid imagination. She was letting an old woman's rambling get the better of her! So Janna scolded herself as she passed a couple of standing stones and several fallen ones that formed a line down the centre of the long avenue. Three huge portal stones stood guard at the end of it. She crossed the causeway over the deep ditch that enclosed the henge and walked between the portal stones.

  The altar stone lay close beside them, just as she had seen it in her imagination. Janna shivered, and quickly walked on towards the centre. Pillars of stone towered above her, casting long, dark shadows in the leaching light of evening. Ravens perched on the lintels, or swooped between the huge monoliths. High above Janna's head a hawk hovered, riding the currents while it searched the grassy downs for a tasty morsel.

  'Isn't this a truly wondrous place?' Winifred appeared at Janna's side. 'I know I shouldn't say that about something that looks so . . . so ungodly,' she continued in an awestruck whisper, 'but this is just . . . just . . .' She waved her hands in helpless admiration.

  Janna nodded in agreement. The pilgrims had begun to move among the ruins now, exclaiming in astonishment as they walked about. Still feeling somewhat unsettled, Janna stuck close to Winifred as they continued to explore. But before the pilgrims had a chance to spread out too far, Bernard clapped loudly to attract everyone's attention. 'My mother wishes to stay here tonight so I suggest you find what shelter you may.'

  Janna glanced at Juliana. She didn't need to be told what the old woman was thinking. Protection. Safety. She wondered to whom Juliana would pray this night, for this was not a Christian site. After the scene she'd conjured up from the past, Janna was willing to stake her life on it. Would the gods answer Juliana's prayers and grant safety to her son? For her sake, for everyone's sake, Janna hoped that they would.

  Bernard seemed about to say something else, but then glanced at his mother and stayed silent. Janna knew that he didn't want to be here at all, was impatient to be gone. She was sure he would hurry them away at first light, and so she continued to explore the stone ruins in company with Winifred, determined to make the most of this opportunity to see everything there was to see.

  They nodded and smiled at several travellers as they passed them by. It seemed that the henge had become a popular site for the halt and the lame. Winifred was stopped by a question from an elderly man dressed in the black robe of a priest. They learned that he was part of a larger group of pilgrims who were scattered elsewhere among the ruins. As the priest and Winifred began to swap travellers' tales, Janna lost interest in their conversation and wandered on.

  A huddled knot of people attracted her attention. Bernard was talking to one of the travellers, a boy scarce grown to manhood. Janna understood his reason for being at the henge when she saw that he was missing an ear. A red, livid scar marred a face that otherwise would have bordered on handsome. Ralph and Adam stood beside Bernard, who frowned heavily as if listening to unwelcome news. Adam wore a calculating expression that Janna instinctively mistrusted, while Ralph stood slightly aside, observing them all. She wondered what the traveller was saying. Curious, she ventured closer and was in time to hear the boy say, '. . . and 'tis said that the bishop is also at odds with the empress over her refusal to reconfirm the Honour of Boulogne on his nephew, Eustace. King Stephen's son, that is.'

  Alarmed by what she'd heard, Janna flicked a glance in Bernard's direction.

  'The bishop has withdrawn his support for the empress? Is that what you're saying?' It was clear that Bernard had also recognised the problems attendant on this new situation and that he shared her concerns about the letter found on the dead man's body.

  The boy shrugged. 'I only know what I was told.'

  Bernard continued to look worried. 'Is there any other information you can give us?' he asked. The boy shook his head and moved onwards, clearly more intent on his own salvation than satisfying the curiosity of strangers.

  Bernard stared after him, his face creased in thought.

  'Are you concerned for the empress?' Ralph asked.

  Bernard shot him a sharp look. 'No!' he said roughly. 'Why should I be?' Without waiting for an answer, he grabbed hold of Adam's arm and dragged him off in the direction of his mother, who, Janna saw, was standing with Golde and Morcar. Janna could only guess at the argument that was likely to follow: Bernard would want to leave, move on straight away. Juliana would want him to stay. And Ralph was still watching them, a witness to everything. Whether he knew it or not, his question had touched a nerve. Janna understood the reason for Bernard's reaction. She wanted to make sure that Ralph did not.

  'It's a great responsibility, trying to please all of the people all of the time, and at the same time steering us all safely to our destination,' she said hastily, by way of explanation.

  'Seemingly one that Bernard does not take lightly.' Ralph grinned at her. Janna was
relieved to see that he apparently thought nothing of it. He stepped closer, and cupped his hand around her shoulder. 'You were going to show me what you keep in your purse,' he said softly. 'Is now a good time?'

  Janna looked about, and shook her head. 'There are too many people about.' She gestured towards her waist, where the purse made a small bump through the fabric of her dress. 'I have to wait until it's properly dark.' To undress. A slow heat suffused her face in case Ralph's thoughts followed her own. 'I want to look around the henge before it gets too dark to see anything,' she said abruptly. 'I'll show you my father's ring tomorrow.' She hurried off, feeling half-relieved and half-disappointed when Ralph made no effort to follow her.

  She was walking quietly among the stones when Bernard found her. He grabbed her by the arm and dragged her towards an open spot where they could not be overheard.

  'No matter what I told Ralph, and in spite of my mother's wishes to the contrary, I've decided I must go to the empress straight away,' he said quietly, his lips close to Janna's ear so that she could hear him. 'I'll leave tonight for I suspect, from what that boy told us, that the empress's position might not be so secure as she thought. In fact, I'm beginning to fear that the bishop's message might even contain an ultimatum.' He hesi-tated a moment as if making up his mind whether or not to confide further in her. Finally he said, 'For your own sake, Johanna, and for your safety, say nothing to anyone of the bishop's messenger and the letter we found on him.'

  Janna heard the urgency in Bernard's voice, and sensed his fear on her behalf. She cursed her unguarded tongue as she remembered her conversation with Ralph. He already suspected they'd found a message, although she hadn't told him whose seal it bore. But it was Ralph's concern over his cousin that had prompted his questions, she reminded herself.

  'I'll say nothing,' she promised, thinking it would only worry Bernard if she confessed what she'd already done.